Keeping it Fresh and Exciting in Your Marriage

Handsome Hubby and I are closing in on 40 years of wedded bliss. Hard to believe. It’s been a long time, true, but still, each day offers thrills. How do we keep it fresh and exciting? What’s our secret? Why, we play games!

In fact, we recently invented a new game.

We play it every day.

In the bathroom.

A-huh.

It not only keeps the matrimonial juices flowing, but it’s aerobic and it’s hygienic!

Now, don’t worry, dear readers, it’s also PG-rated.

Keeping it Fresh in the Marriage … and the Bathroom

The game involves our two wastepaper baskets located beside our two sinks.

The trash cans have always been a bit of an annoyance for me. I come from a family of constant trash-can-emptiers. One piece of trash in, and it’s time to empty them. That’s the tidy, methodical Galatz family way.

HH, an otherwise impeccably neat guy, is not a Galatz. He comes from a long line of fill ’em-to-the-brim, then dump ‘em clan. You know the kind, barbarians! Absolute anathema to a Galatz!

So, as you can imagine, I CONSTANTLY am the martyr, tasked with the solitary job of gathering up the garbage cans and disposing of the trash. HH NEVER does. It’s annoying. No, make that exasperating. No, make that maritally maddening.

Sometimes, I think he puts a tissue or two in his just emptied bathroom trash can just to get my goat!

Trash Talk

To make matters worse, he ALWAYS stuffs large, bulky items in MY wastepaper can … items like the plastic wrappers that cover the dry cleaning or broken hangers. (How a man breaks so many plastic hangers is beside me.)

So, now, to fight trash can fires with fire, I surreptitiously stuff large disposables in his trash can …  tissue boxes and the like.

Now you might observe that I’m really cutting off my nose to spite my face since I’m still the one who’s emptying the trash cans, but there is a method to my madness!

My goal: to quickly fill his garbage can to the rim, so he will be forced to empty it! Genius, right?

Unfortunately, he caught on to my clever plot, and now, he’s sneaking more and more stuff into my garbage can! The can cad!

It’s become a not-so-passive passive-aggressive game. We even attempt trash passes when we’re both in the bathroom with daring acts of distraction. Kissing with backhanded flips of items into the trash can … that sort of thing.

The Games People Play

Why we take such childish delight in this activity, I cannot tell you, but we do. Maybe this is what happens when you’ve been married for almost four decades. Maybe this is what happens when you live in the hinterlands of Nevada and cannot see Broadway shows all the time.

Yet, praise the Gods of Domesticity, specifically the great domed one himself — Mr. Clean, I believe my plaintive lament has been heard.

Just yesterday, after a heady round of bathroom trash can marital foreplay, HH took the two garbage cans out to the garage and emptied them!

Boy, has this marriage got it or what? I tell you!

🗑️ 🗑️ 🗑️

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