Laments About Arthritic Adventures

Social Security Madness

Into the Jaws of the Bureaucratic Beast!

Last week I wrote about turning 65 and signing up for Social Security. Now I was want to tell you what happened next. It isn’t pretty. I quickly descended from “social insecurity” into an advanced state of Social Security Madness.

When I signed up for Social Security benefits this Spring, I also selected Medicare Part B. I didn’t need health insurance; Handsome Hubby and I already have good, inexpensive lifetime coverage. But I thought Medicare is inexpensive and a little extra insurance couldn’t hurt. I was wrong. It’s hurting plenty. Read more

My Mission Impossible? Control

Don't Gen. Al Haig and I wish

My Mission Impossible? Control

Each morning I swear I won’t. Yet every morning, I begin a new round of my personal Mission Impossible. My impossible mission? Get control of my house AND my life.

Each morning I swear I won’t. Yet, first thing each day I make the bed and fluff up the “just for show” pillows. I maniacally wipe down the counters, speed-spritz the fridge to eliminate fingerprints and Windex with a fury the glass dining room table.

Each mid-morning, I swear Read more

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My Mother and Mink

Her Pelts. My Punishment.

My Mother and Mink

My mother was pro-mink. She believed fur symbolized luxury, style, wealth and to the manor born. Not me. I was decidedly anti-fur. I grew up in a cloth coat, pea- jacket, egalitarian world.

My mother was a native New Yorker, so fur was practical too, good for keeping the cold out. I, on the other hand, grew up in sunny Las Vegas. So I avoided the cold and the culture of fur for a long time.

The Fur Flies

But in my late 20s, I was D.C.-bound for an exciting new job. I was also in possession of a small insurance settlement from a leg injury. For my mother, the stars were aligned. She saw fur in my future and pounced. Read more

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50 Shades of Green

Leather Fetish? Nope. Lettuce Fetish!

50 Shades of Green

Remember when salad was simple? Throw together some iceberg lettuce and a few tomatoes and you were done. Now when you shop the produce aisle, you wade through 50 shades of green. Dine out and you wonder if you’re reading a foreign-language menu, so unknown are the leafy options.

These days you need a Ph.D. to make and eat salad! To help sort through the confusion, join me for a walk on the wild produce side. Ready, set, lettuce go! Read more

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I am an Amazon Warrior

Wonder Woman has Nothing on Me

I am an Amazon warrior

I am an Amazon warrior. Not like Wonder Woman, all tricked out in hot pants, a bustier, and bullet-repelling bracelets, but still … Read more

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Gone Fishing? Gone Ranching? Gone to Sea Ranch

Best Mini-Vacay Ever

Sea Ranch

It was a miracle!. Work-a-holic Handsome Hubby hit the pause button and we “got gone” to Sea Ranch, Ca for a four-day vacation. Were we in for a treat! Read more

My Not-So-Merry Market-Go-Round

Modern-Day Mercantile Madness

my not-so-merry market-go-round

Growing up, life was simple. My mother shopped at one supermarket, two at the most. Now I’m on a non-stop, not-so-merry market-go-round, shopping at six different stores. It’s modern-day mercantile madness.

If it’s Tuesday, I go to Whole Foods for oh, so pricy organic produce and meat. Wednesdays, I’m at Safeway. That’s where I get the family prescriptions and non-organic, unhealthful food, like Lay’s potato chips and Diet Coke. By Friday, it’s anybody’s guess. It’s a regular basket free-for-all!  Read more

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Bumping Shoulders with Celebrities

The Highs and Lows of a Social-lite

Hands holding smart phones taking pictures of a celebrity

I grew up in star-studded Las Vegas. My father was a high-roller gambler and we spent a lot of time in casino showrooms. As an adult, I was a news reporter, covering organized crime and the resort-entertainment industry, bumping shoulders with countless celebrities. Later, I worked at a high level of the executive branch of the US government, meeting presidents and a few kings.

You’d think I would have acquired a degree of sophistication along the way. But think again. Embarrassingly, I’m still a bumbling star-gazing social-lite! Read more

Target’s Muddled Remodel

Off-Target at My Favorite Store

Target's muddled remodel

Remember Joni Mitchell’s song “Big Yellow Taxi,” where she lamented about how “they” paved Paradise and put up a parking lot? Well, I know how she feels. “They” just completed a muddled remodel at my favorite Target store. Now I feel like Joni. Paradise – and I – are lost.

Where once greeting cards were displayed, Read more

Some are Natural Born Athletes

Me? Not So Much

Some are natural born athletes

When they passed around the athletic genes, I must have been out to lunch … or shopping … or perhaps napping. Yes, some are natural born athletes. Me? Not so much.

One of my brothers was a great swimmer. Another a beautiful dancer. Me? I’m a klutz. My sport of choice? Jacks. Park my butt on the ground and I could beat most anybody at the basic game or its variations – double bounces, pigs in the pen, over the fence. Yep. I was a jack’s genius.

But, Read more

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