Laments About Arthritic Adventures

The Road to Hell and Vacations

The Plans of Mice and Men

The road to hell

They say the road to Hell — and sometimes vacations — is paved with good intentions. Unfortunately, that’s the story of our recent getaway.

Our vacation was supposed to be a respite from pandemic, politics, and wildfires. It was supposed to be fun. Relaxing. But it turned out to be a vacation hellscape. Read more

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It’s Almost THAT Time of the Month

Handsome Hubby Beware

It’s almost that time of the month. No, not THAT time of the month. That’s long past. The time of the month I’m referring to the day when big, boring household chores come due. Why on the first? Read more

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Nailed It! The Art of Home Manicures

In My Dreams

Nailed it

After almost six months of sheltering-at-home, I thought I had nailed it. Yes, I thought I finally had mastered the art of applying nail polish to my own fingernails.

At first, it was a challenge. You see, I was a mani-novice. Read more

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Call Me Ms. Inspector Gadget

I’ve Got the Nowhere to Go Binge-Buying Gadget Blues

Call Me Ms. Inspector Gadget

Remember the long-running kids’ cartoon show featuring the dim-witted, multi-tooled-crime-fighting police Inspector Gadget, voiced by TV’s popular Don Adams, aka Get Smart character Maxwell Smart? Well, nowadays, you might as well call me, Ms. Inspector Gadget.

Why? Read more

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Addicted to (Fill in the Blank)

What's Your Cannot Control Compulsion?

Addicted to

Robert Palmer sang of being “Addicted to Love.” Weird Al Yankovic parodied with “Addicted to Spuds.” Me? I’m addicted to books. More accurately, I’m addicted to book-buying.

Left unrestrained, Read more

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DoorDash and Dashed Hopes

Dinner was Not Served!

DoorDash and Dashed Hopes

If you read my work, you know that Handsome Hubby is the kindest, sweetest, most patient man — no, make that — the kindest, sweetest, most patient person on the planet. He practically qualifies for sainthood. And this coming from a Jewish girl is high praise indeed.

So, keep that in mind when I tell the following story of my almost-a-saint spouse and his terrible, rotten, no good day. Read more

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Drug Warning Labels Need Amending

Do Not Operate Heavy Machinery OR Bake Cakes

Drug warning labels

Drug warning labels need amending ASAP. Henceforth, labels need note: do not operate heavy machinery OR bake cakes while under the influence of certain medications.

Bakers, take heed. Read more

Picking Apart Lady Pockets

Holey Sexism!

let's pick apart ladies pockets

Let’s talk pockets. More specifically, the lack of proper lady pockets. It’s a problem every female from seven to seventy-seven knows too well. Read more

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Walk This Way!

Avoid Pedestrian Rage

Walk this way

I’m not usually a hard rock fan. Nonetheless, I’m inspired by hard rockin’ Aerosmith’s hit song “Walk This Way,” because I too want everybody to walk a very specific way. And if they do, I’m 100% confident it will solve today’s pandemic pedestrian equivalent of road rage.

The source of this rage?  Read more

Five Tips for Stylish Mask Wearing

A Middle-Aged Mask Maven Speaks

Five Tips for Stylist Mask Wearing

Wearing a mask is essential. Wearing a mask is the right thing to do. But wearing a mask is driving me meshuga. That’s Yiddish for crazy. But now help is at hand. Here are my Five Tips for Fun, Comfortable, and Stylish Mask Wearing. Read more

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