Laments About Still a Looker

It’s My Birthday and I’ll Ramble If I Want To!

Assorted Thoughts on my B-day

It's My Birthday and I'll Ramble If I Want To

It’s my 68th birthday. I’m not having a party, but I do have a few random thoughts on texting, cartoons, and not-so-complimentary compliments. Read more

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Belly Fat, No Belly Laughs

Ho, Ho, Oh, No!

Belly Fat, Not Belly Laughs

Much like Scarlett O’Hara, I once took much pride in my tiny waist. But that was long ago. Now, more like Santa Claus, I have belly fat. But no belly laughs from me. More, oh, no, no than ho, ho, ho!

Yes, once, I was a lass with a classic hourglass figure, but time, Read more

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Sleep Apnea? Not Me. No Way.

Except It Seems So

I’ve been a “teensy” tired lately. Well, honestly, I’ve been exhausted for months. I wake up tired no matter what time I go to sleep. No matter if I nap. No matter what. Sleep apnea, you surmise. No way, I say! Read more

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As We Age, Doctors Say the Darndest Things

Physician, Heal Thyself!

As we age

“As we age …”

“I assume you’re retired.”

“It’s just part of the aging process.”

These phrases are part of my new — and offensive — normal, as I make my unmerry round of first-time doctor appointments in our new hometown. Read more

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It’s All a Blur. A Problem with My Eyes

At Last! An Old-Age Lament I'm Ok With!

A Problem with My Eyes

For at least a year now, I’ve noticed a problem with my eyes. No, that’s not specific enough. I’ve noticed a problem with my vision. No, that’s still not specific enough. For almost one year, I’ve had increasing trouble seeing. There. I’ve said it. I’m having trouble seeing. Read more

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My Face Has Gone to the Dogs

More Bow Wow than Wow

My face has gone to the dogs

When I was a child, my Uncle George would grab my cheeks so hard I thought he’d lift me off the ground.

“Such a shayna punim,” he’d exclaim with joy. (The term is Yiddish. It literally means “pretty face” but colloquially means what a pretty girl.)

“Yes!” my parents would reply with equal joy.

At 6, I hated Uncle George as I rubbed my aching cheeks, and I hated my parents for allowing this unwelcome greeting. Read more

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Woman in Fashion Rut

Seeking Inspiration STAT

I'm in a fashion rut

I’ve got the wildfire + mask-wearing + middle-aged blues. Yes, I’m a woman in a fashion rut. I need inspiration STAT. Read more

Icon Iris Apfel: Still Stylish at 100

Meeting Up with an Old Friend at Lowe's

Icon Iris Apfel

I ran into an old friend at Lowe’s this weekend. It was quite a surprise for two reasons. First, she lives in NYC, and second, she’s 100 years old. You just don’t expect to run into centennials in the paint section of a hardware store on a wildfire-fueled smoky Saturday in Nevada. But there she was, Iris Apfel. Read more

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Crocs are Still a Thing!

My Aching Bunions Rejoice. My Stylish Soul Laments

Crocs are still a thing

Last night, in bunion distress, I tossed out the last of my chic pointy high heels. My achy feet rejoiced, but my stylish soul cried out in despair. Later, seeking new comfortable shoes to buy, I discovered — to my extreme horror — crocs are still a thing!

They’re not just a “thing,” they’re proliferating — like mushrooms, mildew, and nuclear weapons. Read more

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Air Guitar Glam, Glory and Sweat

I Need a New Sport. I Need a New Body

AIr guitar

Sheltering-at-home baking. Sheltering-at-home Zoom meetings. And sheltering-at-home EVERYTHING has created a severe case of a sheltering-at-home chubby body. I need to do something STAT to shake up the doldrums and this lardy body surrounding them. Hey, I know. I need air guitar.

Now please don’t tell me to “Just go for a walk.” BORING. Read more

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